Weekly Writing Challenge: A Pinch of You

28 Jul

Makes 1 Fagelmouse

Serves everyone (unintentionally)

You will need an electric whisk, a spatula and round, loose-bottomed cake tin.

The Fagelmouse is a sweetbitter dish, great for entertaining or to have all to yourself with a movie. Though suitable for any season, it tends to work best in early summer, when you could serve it alongside strawberries and raspberries to really bring out its flavours.


For the base:

1 pair ripe Converse, preferably green

Animal or cake – patterned socks

50g butter, melted

For the filling:

4 eggs, separated

400g cream cheese

100ml full-fat milk

Vanilla essence


1 Woolly jumper (stripy)

1 -2 shelf-fuls of classic literature, shredded

2 generous tbsp. each of Latin and Greek

Pinch each French, Russian

For the insecure centre:

200g self-doubt

100g very dark chocolate

Dash of liqueur (of your choice)

For the topping:

100g Blanched hazelnuts

25g sugar

Feminism, to taste

Cocoa powder for dusting

(chocolate) curls

Preheat your oven to 130C (any hotter and the Fagelmouse will burn, no matter how much suncream you put on). Grease and base-line your cake tin.

To make the base, crumble the Converse and socks together (size 5 pieces) and pour over the melted butter. Stir to combine, then press firmly into the cake tin. Don’t worry if the bottom looks a bit uneven. Genes, eh? Set aside to chill as much as possible.

For the filling, beat together the egg yolks, cream cheese, milk, vanilla, naivete and woolly jumper. In a clean bowl, whisk the egg whites until holding stiff peaks. Then, a spoonful at a time, whisk in the classic literature (Edwardian and Victorian are best for this, although you could use anything you have to hand) and the languages, until you have a reasonably firm meringue. Remember the attributes of a good meringue – pale, sweet and soft in the middle. Overcooking them can turn them bitter.

Next, beat 1/3 of the meringue mixture into the cream-cheese mixture to loosen it slightly. Fold in the remaining 2/3 with your trusty spatula.

Place a cup in the centre of your biscuit-base and distribute the cream cheese mixture in a ring around it.

To make the insecure, dark, verging on bitter filling, break the chocolate into a bowl, then heat the self-doubt in a small pan until just boiling. Pour the self-doubt over the chocolate and add the liqueur. Leave to stand for at least 2 minutes and then stir together until fully combined.

With the self-doubt mix ready, lift the cup out of the centre of the sweet cheese mix and quickly pour the filling in its place. Use a palette knife to distribute some of the cheese mix over the self-doubt, but don’t panic if you can’t cover it all up – this will create an interesting visual effect.

Bake the Fagelmouse for 45 minutes. It won’t go brown.

While the Fagelmouse is cooking, make the topping. Toss the hazelnuts, sugar and feminism together on a baking tray and roast for ten minutes until crunchy. Some bits may be slightly unpalatable, though they’re good for you so don’t complain!

You can tell when the Fagelmouse is cooked as it will have that lovely inner-thigh wobble that all good cheesecakes and – er – inner thighs – have. Set aside to cool before removing from the tin.

Sprinkle the feminism/hazelnut topping over the Fagelmouse and dust with cocoa powder. Strew the top liberally with curls. Let them do their own thing – messiness is part of the look.

Serve with lots and lots of tea and a healthy dollop of wit on the side – unless you’d rather wallow in the chocolatey centre, in which case, omit the wit and take your tea with tears.

For what inspired this: http://dailypost.wordpress.com/2013/07/22/weekly-writing-challenge-recipe/


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